Spectrum Greetings

Cut to the chase....

Once upon a time there lived a boy called Lovely Son (LS) for whom autism dwelt within. He is now twelve years of age and regularly delivers me messages and thoughts and ideas from his world, that I sense he would appreciate me sharing with you in your world, from time to time. LS lives with his twin sister and fourteen year old sister, for whom attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) dwells within. Please note that the twin sister does not have any neurological deviation dwelling within her make up. She is a very loyal twin sister. Anyway, these three individuals reside with their mum (me) and dad.

Now, if I were to write a list of LS’s guidelines for a more harmonious world (for him at least) then ‘Cut to the chase’ would be up there on that list. To explain further:

Please do not leave a scissors in LS’s midst. For if some tangible aspect of his environment is bugging him he’ll simply cut it out..literally-speaking. In the world of autism the grey shade is not that apparent. Life is easier it seems, if it’s viewed as black or white or in or out or up or down…and so on in this fashion..

For example, a lot of us may look at our hairstyle from time to time and think, ‘yep, I could do with another trim soon, my hair is beginning to obscure my vision. LS on the other hand may have a single stray strand wafting in the orbital region from time to time…but it has to go. No thoughts on brush it back or slick it back maybe with a bit of hair gel? No it has to go.. now! So it’s ‘where’s the scissors gone?’ (LS) and then, ‘where’s the hair gone??’ (me) before we know it. The problem with this really is that LS quite frankly doesn’t give two hoots what the rest of the world thinks of his appearance. It’s a real defining feature of autism that fact you know; that very stark lack of awareness for how others feel about a situation. If you think about it though, there are some significant plusses to having this trait in one’s persona…For we have a child who is not affected at all by peer pressure, who simply does not ‘get’ the fame/celebrity/designer commodities thing…I for one can live with that trait both very happily and economically as a parent. However I must not forget that a very significant portion of people in the world do put a certain value on aesthetics….fair enough…so I don’t want LS stared at or ridiculed because of a very severe self-inflicted hair trim. The ridicules and stares won’t bother him, but they will bother me….and I don’t like to be bothered in this fashion. So the scissors has to remain out of the reach of LS’s hand grasp. No debate on that one.

Equally tickets and labels have been hacked out of clothing over the years; and not always with a scissors; sometimes mere brute force will do the job equally well. LS can’t stand the feeling of labels brushing on his skin; this is a sensory issue very common with autism, I have now learned. So now I know he has this issue I get those labels off ASAP or buy specialist clothing with no labels. LS is a much happier boy for this arrangement…and if LS is happy then those around him are generally happy too, I note. And if they’re not happy, well they can’t blame LS I tell myself…